My First Sestina,

across from all the lillies blooming, (a)
the snails slithering across the street (b)
if only I could capture more of your time (d)
down Nimrod road, around the corner (c)
we sat at bus 59’s stop (e)
as the rain continued dripping by(f)

as time passes by (f)
our relationship starts blooming (a)
the bus doesn’t stop (e)
for us, waiting on the street (b)
we take our time (d)
holding hands around the corner ©

We hide in this corner
just trying to get by
passing time
the weeds beneath our feet are blooming
beneath the stone cold street
we watch as if the world has stopped

the rain stops (e)
as we race around the corner (c)
We have to get back to the high street (b)
Our bus is about to pass us by! (f)
now all the flowers are too wet to bloom (a)
We are running out of time! (d)

looking out the window watching time
slip away, the bus stops
we get out, and watch the sun bloom
from around the Elephant and Castle corner.
The large sun hasn’t stopped by
in quite awhile, behind the bustled streets

We kiss goodbye on the highstreet
always on time.
we say goodbye.
as the world around us blooms
because it feels like time always stops

when Im with you on the street, spring time is best for bloom
if only there was enough time, as I reach around the corner,
if only we didn’t let time pass by, and everything just stops.


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Whenever the sun at the close of day,
Colors all the western sky,
Oh my heart returns to the desert grey
And the mountains tow’ring high.
Where the moon beams play in shadowed glen,
With the spotted fawn and doe,
All the live long night until morning light,
Is the loveliest place I know.

Home means Nevada
Home means the hills,
Home means the sage and the pines.
Out by the Truckee’s silvery rills,
Out where the sun always shines,
There is the land that I love the best,
Fairer than all I can see.
Right in the heart of the golden west
Home means Nevada to me.

I miss home tonight.

Thursday Night, hundreds of people piled in and piled out at The Mentor Show.. A long wait wrapping around leading up to the door. All my nerves, I am so incredibly Thankful for everyone that showed up.. Ashley Macknica, I interned under her at Marie Claire showed up, The scout from Ryan McGinley, Phoebe Prickett showed up, my old therapist, who reminded me how far I’ve come, many alumni which made me so happy, and all the beautifully dressed artist, and my mom 🙂
We have a lot more in common then I ever imagined. Seeing all the artwork together, eating all the sweets, and loving to just relax. Thats where I get it from, my obsession with staying home, and sleeping. She picked up fruits and made me feel at home. I miss having her around. I might try and come home for a month in the summer time, just to be next to my mom. I know the city was hard for her the last few days.. but I enjoyed having her around. Being sick got on my nerves though. I just want to not cough anymore.

My school Therapist reminded me how far I’ve come, apparently anytime the office staff see me, they thank him, we weren’t sure if I was going to make it the first two years at school. My first year at school was hard. Seeing my work with my mom, was harder. We cried. I miss my dad, we wish he could’ve seen my work that day, or how far I’ve come. Its been too long. We watched the sunset together, and then went around and saw the artwork on the walls. As Joe Sinnott once said, “You are definitely not weak Melissa, sensitive, but not weak. Most definitely strong.”

My mom got to meet everyone that delt with me, and saved me the first two years of school that day.. and all the wonderful comments from my friends/peers, made my heart light up.. I can’t thank everyone enough.. I can’t believe I made it this far. I honestly didn’t think it was possible..

Why I Wake Early

Hello, sun in my face.

Hello, you who made the morning

and spread it over the fields

and into the faces of the tulips

and the nodding morning glories,

and into the windows of, even, the

miserable and the crotchety –

best preacher that ever was,

dear star, that just happens

to be where you are in the universe

to keep us from ever-darkness,

to ease us with warm touching,

to hold us in the great hands of light –

good morning, good morning, good morning.

Watch, now, how I start the day

in happiness, in kindness.”

― Mary Oliver

English may not be your first language, but thats okay.
Dear Konstantinos,
our rooms were right next to one another,
we always bumped into eachother,
just to say hi

you and I were always doing our best
you were on the basket ball court.
I was in dance class.

you held my hair back
and fought me, when I was wrong
you taught me it was okay to love,
even when I wouldn’t love

holding hands at heathrow airport
52800 seconds away.
looking into your eyes
always longing to capture
more of your time
but now this is goodbye.

a couple came into work today
to try on batheing suites
in a parallel universe
that was me and you.


I’ll be fine?

UMD doctors office,
north 4th street
Doctor Cole shiny shoes
strolling into the office,
calm and cool
puts me in the first room.
caring and charismatic
I still can’t breath
he looks up at me with his brown eyes
You’ll be okay, he says
dosing me on all the meds he can find
hopefully this cough syrup will calm me down
I think its your anxiety he says,
You’ll be fine, look I’ve already talked to more doctors.

sitting at the UMD
the doctor caught a crush on me,
too bad he misdiagnosed me.
now I am back, and still. can’t.